At the India Homeschoolers Conference, there was some mention of volunteerism and how sometimes a professional who is paid to do a job, does it better, is less tired and so on. Those thoughts and words sent me on a flashback down memory lane, when I started my life and found a new passion in special education, about twenty years ago, as a volunteer.
I did my graduation in Physics and was adamant about continuing with a Masters' and exploring areas like astrophysics and metaphysics which were very close to my heart then. But my marks were just not good enough to help me get on the path to pursue that. I took a year off and just chilled at home, writing poetry, reading and doing nothing most times! I wonder today how magnanimous my parents were to allow me to do what I wanted then! Perhaps I would have done well if they had unschooled me too, although I really have no regrets now! It was around that time, when my mother felt I was feeling low or depressed, that she spoke to me about The Spastics Society of India (now Vidya Sagar) and how I could volunteer there if I liked it. It was a very different path that I hardly knew anything about and wanted to give it a try....and so I went. From then on, there was no looking back....from Physics to Special Education, in a family of high achievers was
something that was unheard of and unthinkable too in many ways. But my
parents supported my decision and that was all that mattered.
I joined as a volunteer in a class which had children with severe multiple disabilities - who were almost like vegetables to the outside world - incapable of anything. But being a volunteer there opened my eyes to a whole new world where achievement, joy, parenting, teaching and living were redefined and looked at with a fresh perspective and a different yet colourful lens. All my problems that had once loomed large over me, faded into thin air, when I lived with the parents and their concerns and difficulties everyday with their child.....not looking at them as problems, but as challenges to take on. I learned to celebrate life and living. I learned to give and do without hope of return. I don't know if I could have learned a better way of doing that if I was a paid staff member.
I was a volunteer for about six months before I joined the course in special education, and those were some of the most cherished moments in my life. With myself, I found that I was more passionate, committed and sincere when I did something voluntarily rather than when I got paid for it. I don't know why. Maybe it was because volunteerism has a lot to do with interest, passion and inner drive. I hardly took a day off, was almost always there on time, worked over time too to finish things off, and didn't tire of the work involved. I did not have the same feelings later, when I joined as a staff member in the same place. I was sincere and hard-working and committed to my work, but something was missing. I wonder why now.
I feel now that money binds us and builds walls. I feel that it destroys rather than creates. I feel that it transports the motivation to outside of us - so there is no longer that intrinsic motivation or passion that drives and creates, but rather the extrinsic motivation that is dependent so much on the environment and everything else from outside of us. Money often sets expectations and limits, while volunteerism liberates and expands one to look beyond oneself and the task at hand. Volunteerism makes one more proactive and allows one to take ownership and pride in one's own work. It gives one a true sense of participation and self-worth that is not measured, judged, appraised and compared. I felt all this and more when I was a volunteer at both Vidya Sagar and Consumers Association of India. I felt I achieved a lot more than what I did when I was paid for a job that had to be done.....because when you volunteer, you put your heart and soul into the work you take on....you put yourself into it first before anything else....you work on it with passion and love that cannot be replaced by anything else in this world.....when you volunteer, you give yourself....and sometimes perhaps that is why you remember both the pain and joy of volunteering more than any other job that you have taken on!
So have you volunteered for anything in your life? Can you recall the pleasure and / or pain of doing that?
in the black wilderness,
in the black wilderness,
