The Seed

I once held
a little seed tight
in my line-crossed palm,
waiting for the perfect time,
the perfect place
to set him free;

I watched the seasons
being born and die,
I watched the sun beat down
upon the burning earth,
I watched the flickering lights
upon a blackened sky,
I watched the storms
rage on and swivel by,
and held on tightly
to the tiny seed -
he couldn't go,
just yet, I thought;

until I saw a bird
drop a seed
while he whistled by -
where the sun and the stars,
the dark and the storms,
and the warm earth
where she tumbled
and giggled,
and cried and rested,
played with her,
shaped her,
and opened her,
so she could share
her gifts with them
and the world;

and I dropped
my little seed
quietly to the ground,
to set him free,
as I set myself free
from a tethered world.

The Eye of the Storm

the clouds are gathering
far away from
your sleepy eyes,
yet close,
they are closing in
over her unmoored heart,
that cannot be stilled -
no, not any more;
and then
from the eye of the storm,
rises a roll of thunder
and a lightning bolt,
that splits wide open
her encased heart;
and she roars -
her roar is a call
to all those wild hearts
that are tired
of locks and keys
and cozy walls;
those who are willing
to bleed with her,
to roar with her,
to feel the wind,
to touch the earth,
to soak in the rain, and
to smell the inner mystery;
to live untamed
and simply be
without an apology,
in the eye of the storm.

Stillness

thoughts afloat
upon little blobs
of seaweed
carried across
to nowhere,
circling ripples
cradle dreams
held close
to a quiet bosom
where stillness reigns.

The Fire

and when you saw
the dancing flames
you thought
you were the fire,
and encircled it
with your wild dance,
until you saw
the burning logs
that skinned themselves
to soundless black dust.

Through the Eyes of a Fly

sometimes I wish
I could swap my eyes
with those of a fly,
so I don't have to move
or control my eyes
to see what I want to see;
how beautiful it must be
to have a thousand eyes
that see the world as one
through their
unfocussed stillness!

Silence

I

and when the world was asleep,
empty and hungry
after the noise and glare
of yet another tiring day,
I sank into those pools
of unfocussed joy,
I watched your tiny lips
curl over my breast,
as we drank in
the fullness of silence
together -
mother and weaned baby;
two souls set
in the peace and stillness
of an extraordinary star-filled night.


II

amidst gunshots and slogans,
buildings razed and moving homes,
I wonder how we are so noisy,
when we are but little specks of dust
stumbling and falling through the cosmos;
when the big things that drive us
seem to move and grow
in deep silence -
the earth pirouetting on her axis,
stars exploding into themselves,
cells dividing and sharing their glory,
the sap flowing through to light up a dainty flower,
rainclouds cooking up a storm in an empty sky;
I have to pay attention to that silence,
and let it flow through me, with me.


III

and I unpacked my silence
as I stared into the inflamed sky
sipping on my warm tea,
so I could be wholly aflame
with the silence of an ordinary day,
like the Flame of the Forest
lighting up a deserted highway.

Joy Unplugged

and you poured yourself
into this one empty vessel,
until she trembled
and broke open
through her every pore;
only to become a sieve
who could hold you
not to fill herself,
but to let you flow through
to water and grow
a wild garden.

Anger

your anger
pierces
my every pore -
needles of love
stuck to a skin
too taut
to be touched
by the tender petals
of a bleeding rose
held between the thorns.

My Dreams Found Me, Through You

when you sleep under the stars tonight
in the rich wilderness of a mind at rest,
and the silence of the dark woods,
where your wild heart can roam free
and dip into the gushing waterfall
somewhere behind, beyond, at will,
you will know that you rested
upon the doorstep
of my precious chalet
of long-held dreams
that found me today,
through you.

In the Sun

"Be kind to yourself"
said someone,
and I shaded my eyes
to see the sun;
"You'll never learn that way;
keep looking at it",
said someone,
and I squinted and strained
to hold its harshness;
"Watch it as it rises and sets,
rages and glows",
said a little voice
rising from the hole
in my middle,
and that's how I began
to enjoy the sunsets,
and sunrises
and the sun at its zenith,
as I looked at myself
instead of the sun.

Candy Floss and Thorns

it's funny how
when I dream,
I don't think of
pretty pink candy floss
melting on warm tongues,
I think of sweet, chewy pineapple
with its hard-to-rid prickly thorns.

Desires and Dreams

and when the world
asked me all over again,
"what about your desires
and dreams?"
I smiled to myself
and looked into the stars
with a glint in my eyes:
"if you keep looking deeply
into the ones
that catch your eye,
you will know
that there is no need
to jump up
so you can touch them
or grab them;
you will know
if you wait long enough,
that they will be yours
some day, in some way;
and you will then see
how they came down
to be with you,
in your eyes,
in your heart,
right now."

In the Dark

and I wondered why
the whole world
looked for light
in the name of oneness,
when it was darkness
that made things
look the same.

I Wish to Die

I wish to die
where two oceans meet,
where water becomes sky,
where rain becomes snow,
where fire becomes clouds;

I wish to die
where the wind becomes dust
upon a dancing sunbeam
floating through
an open window;

I wish to die
not in the glare of the sun, 
but in the darkness of the night,
where there are no Mondays
or Wednesdays, or months or years;

I wish to die
in the circle
that is a line
that is a dot
that is nothing.

I wish to die
in the silence
of words
that I know exist,
without a name.

Samurai

and the wind asked the tree,
rooted between seasons -
which leaf would be
the next one to go;
and the leaves
they began to dance
and sing their swan song,
while the tree watched on
in a quiet celebration,
knowing it was time
for each warrior
to lay his life down
upon his sword.

I remember

I remember

those tiny notes

of love

from Jonathan Livingstone Seagull,

small squares

of white emptiness,

full of a few lines

drawn from the heart,

and a nondescript sketch

of a tiny bird

in a corner,

to where my eyes

wandered every time,

like a compass

at rest;

I remember how I loved

your writing –

how you made yourself small

through your word art,

and how you stood out

through your disappearance,

simplicity and austerity;

I remember so many things

of our times together,

and perhaps memories

are the simple ways

we remember

the changing

and the changeless

in each of us.

Strength

when you told me that I was strong,
I asked myself what that would mean:
was I strong like a banyan
propped up by its many roots
that stand long after the tree is gone?
was I strong like a blade of grass
curved and pressed to the earth
by the soles of your heavy feet,
only to rise again after you have passed?
or was I strong like that little flower
who nodded her head
to every passing sunbeam and storm?

Connection

and while I walked
along the water's edge,
I watched the ocean
let go of
wave after wave,
as each crashed
to its end
along an unrequited shore;
and I wondered
how she did that
tirelessly,
and as I sat down
and picked up
a fistful of sand,
only to let it fly
through my fingers
and into the wind,
I saw the world
of love -
of sand and waves,
clouds and sky
and a lone soul like me
upon an empty beach,
touching each other
through each other, 
connected, entangled,
in an intricate dance
of worlds within worlds.

Blind

and I realised
when I was with you
that my world
was not dark
and devoid of colours
that I could not see
with my own eyes,
but that I needed
your eyes
to see
your world
in mine,
and
my world
as mine.

Reflections

and while the rivers rushed
and the seas danced
in an unfathomable reverie,
I quietly held a mirror
for the sky, the clouds,
the sun, the stars,
the moon, the mountains,
and the trees
with their flowers;
and I realised
that was the only way
I could find
and see myself -
with you, in you.

The Well

and when you come to me
with your thirsting eyes
and dip into the stillness
and unknown depths
that give me form,
my parched lips
feel their own wetness
when you leave
with your newly filled eyes.

The Point of No Return

and when I reach
the point of no return,
a dead-end,
an empty wall, or
a broken ridge -
mute sentinels
to a necessary
trespassing
of the soul
which already knows
the way home,
I will stand
face to face
with the abruptness
of death, and
the faint probability
of life;
there - in the space
between stories,
old and new;
where the next step
is born
not from a choice
of this or that, but
from the groundless ground
of a defenseless open heart,
that has suddenly remembered
the possibilities beyond
the point of no return.

Peace

as I watched the ripples
fold in from all sides,
creasing the blue
and the rolling green,
my drifting eyes
slowed to a stop
where every line
drawn out
held worlds at war,
clinging to the shores
of certainty;
and somewhere there
between the creases
and folds
and the shifting canvas
of unexplored worlds,
I sank into peace.

Lisa

and when you came home

one day dear Lisa,

we made a special space

for you,

and while you danced

and pranced

to every nook,

you took three melting hearts

along with you;

and as I watched you rest

between my feet,

and drowned myself

in those soulful pools,

frozen memories 

thawed to give way

to your warm tongue

painting Love

on my blessed face!

Awakening

and I opened my eyes
one day
to see the world
wake up with me
to another glorious morn,
stretching
her eyes and limbs
to hold the sun
and the moon
and the countless stars
in her unfolding whorls,
kissed by the magic
of a thousand splendid suns
basking in the grace
of their splintered existence
in her ever-faithful arms.

 

Swell

and I thought
it was time
to empty myself
with the fullness
of the moon,
until I found
my being swell
with every ebb;
fullness is a name
we choose
to adorn
what cannot be named,
what cannot be beautified -
the infinite vessel
which holds and feels
everything
to its brim,
and its ever-widening
lines and circles,
where I am reborn,
with every swell.

Purpose

and when someone asked me:
what do you want to do in life?
what are your dreams?
what are your deepest desires?
I smiled to myself
and looked up
into the sky,
and I saw
a bird
a cloud
a setting sun
and a million stars
laughing
with the moon,
doing the same thing
day after day -
simply celebrating
themselves,
and all of life.