Uninvited

she came one day
uninvited
into my home,
no doorbell,
no knock on wood,
she slipped in through
some unseen gap,
snuggled into a seat,
demanded a cup of tea,
a large book,
and her favourite music
playing in the background,
while I followed her
like a hapless shadow,
not knowing what to do.

of course I didn't like her,
not in the beginning,
she was a thorn in my flesh,
I could not pull out,
reminding me
of forgotten selves
I had to learn to live with,
she was the night herself,
firing up shadows
that loomed over eyes
unable to look away,

ah yes,
she came, she saw,
she stayed,
and she conquered!

and I don't know why
or when or how
I grew to like her,
to sit with her,
with my cup of tea
every morning,
to cuddle up with her
every night with that book,
and listen to the music she loved
as my feet began to tap
to that catchy tune,

perhaps it's because
she's been here so long,
or because she's freed something
inside me, something
wild and unstoppable like her,
she's made me feel the rush of blood
kissing every breath
as it passes the door,
she's made it easier for me
to stand there on the edge,
to say goodbyes and hellos,
with eyes that are awake
yet blind,
she's made me feel the wetness
of a growing mystery
that I dip my feet into,
feet that need no ground
but a limitless sky,
as I chase clouds and tickle stars,
falling in love
with everything
that makes the night
uncertain.